FAT GIRL LIFE

My battle of the bulge has begun once again in what I hope is the final chapter of this fat ass book called my FAT GIRL LIFE!

June 27, 2006

And So It Begins

Monday, June 19th I started NutriSystem weighing in at 260 pounds. Unbelievable! I weighed in 7 days later on June 26th at 252. I had lost 8 lbs in 1 week!! Ecstatic? OH HELL YES! I am finally seeing results, although it is just the beginning of this journey.

A little background: I used to be very "in-shape," at a very good weight of 130. I'm 5'4" tall so I'm no basketball player, but I looked very good and very toned. I worked out with weights six days a week. I wanted to be either a body builder (big mistake) or a fitness model. I was poised to do just that when I got pregnant at 19.

Yup, an accident that I don't regret because I love my son (who is 16 today!) more than my own life. But, being pregnant wreaked havoc on my poor bod. I got stretched out in the stomach and breasts and even my inner thighs. I had edema so badly that the day my 9 lb 12.5 oz son was born I lost 25 lbs. I went from the cankles to ankles over night! Whew!

That was just the beginning though. I have struggled for 16 years with my weight. I almost had it conquered in 1996 and 1997. I went on a "diet" pill and pretty much starved myself, but I managed to drop down to 140. Only 5 lbs above my pre-pregnancy weight!! I was on cloud nine, though I didn't quite look the same bodywise, I was closing in on being myself again.

Then, in July of 1997 I moved to Atlanta, GA. I was very stressed over a traumatic breakup. I had quit my job and moved from my hometown in Illinois to Atlanta. I moved myself and my son in with my parents until I could get on my feet. Within a month of the move I had gained (NO LIE) 30 lbs!!! I don't know how, I don't know why, but I know it was something wrong in my body.

I struggled for a few more years and stayed around the 170 lb mark. That was tough for me. I worked a job at a desk so I wasn't getting much exercise so my ass kept getting fatter and fatter! UGH! God, I hated having a cottage cheese ass! I was holding steady at a size 12 to size 14 (depending on the size). I was still buying in the regular sizes so I didn't give it much thought beyond not liking the junk in my trunk!

Then, what seemed virtually overnight, I gained another 30 lbs. I was tipping the scales at 205. I had NEVER been over 200 lbs before! Scared me to death! I also started getting bad adult acne on my face and chest and upper back, as well my hair started thinning on top and I started getting black hair here and there on my face, like wiskers under my chin (probably 10 in all) and a couple around the sides of my mouth. That freaked me out the worst!

So I went to the gynocolgist for my annual and told her what had been happening with my body. She put me on Aldactone after checking my androgen levels which were significantly elevated.

I couldn't understand why she wasn't looking for the underlying condition as to WHY my andgrogen levels were high and what else could be caused by high levels of angrogens. So, I took my blood test results to my PCP and told her I thought I needed an endocrinologist. She agreed with me and sent me to see Endocrinologist, Dr. Shore.

Within five minutes of talking to Dr. Shore he knew what was wrong with me. I had Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome or PCOS, also known as Leventhal-Stein Syndrome. I was producing too much male hormone, causing my hair to thin (male pattern baldness), adult acne, and my periods were not regular. Another problem with PCOS is that because testosterone levels are high they cause my insulin levels to rise. But the problem was this disease also had caused me to become insulin resistant. Which meant that the receptor sites on my cells which insulin attached to to open my cells up for glucose (energy) wouldn't work so glucose built up in my blood stream causing me to be in early stages of Type II Diabetes. My body, because it wasn't getting the glucose I was bringing in, thought it was starving, therefore it stored most of what I ate as fat.

Crazy, huh?

I thought so. He put me on glucophage (generic is metformin) and kept me on aldactone. Over the next three to four years he would repeatedly put me on Lexapro, then switch me to phentermine, back and forth, back and forth. I couldn't be on an anti-depressant AND phentermine, apparently that is very dangerous. So I ended up staying on the Lexapro. I really feel better being on it

But the weight kept creeping on. I was at 225, then 235, then 253!

My mother and I joined Weight Watchers last June of 2005. I lost 25 pounds in 3 months. I was pretty proud of myself. But then, I started having female trouble.

I started cramping like crazy. I felt like I was in labor only with no breaks between the pains. It was awful. I had surgery to see if I had endometriosis. Turns out I did have a form of it, only it was within the muscles of the walls of my uterus. Internal Endometriosis is called Adenomyosis.

At this point I'm wondering WTF!!! What the hell is going on with my freakin' body!? My gynecologist put me on Lupron Depot therapy to control the pain. It put me in temporary menopause so I wouldn't produce estrogen which kept the Adenomyosis at bay. Temporarily.

That brings me to today. I saw my gyno yesterday for the first time since my therapy ended last month. She put me on the NuvaRing in an attempt to control the pain and my periods. The pain is guaranteed to come back. The only sure cure is a hysterectomy. I'm okay with that, I'm done having kids and the Mr. is snipped. But my doctor said my insurance company would likely not pay for it since, at the moment, I'm symptom free...sort of.

So, I decided, at 260 lbs I needed to do something drastic. I have been on so many diets: diabetic diets, Weight Watchers, Adkins, phentermine pills, the list goes on and on. Now, I'm trying NutriSystem as a last ditch effort to lose this weight. With a 42 BMI and being 100+ lbs over weight I'm a prime candidate for gastric bypass surgery, but that's a route I'm just not ready to take. Not yet.

So, I hope that anyone who comes to read this blog will support me in my efforts and please share whatever has worked for you as far as weight loss goes. If you are a PCOS sufferer like me, then I'm sure you share my frustration and perhaps we can chat about our experiences as kindred spirits!

Stay with me as I make this last ditch effort to lose 130 pounds!

Wish me luck!

9 Comments:

At 6/27/2006 2:41 PM, Blogger J R Estelle said...

Best of luck to you. I too, struggle with my weight on a daily basis. It's tough. Sometimes it's so much easier to to say screw it and just sit down and eat.

 
At 6/27/2006 2:50 PM, Blogger Ms. M said...

God I wish I could just eat! I am not hungry on this diet, but I am obviously not eating the foods I want to, like ice cream or pie! I don't eat food like that often, but it's nice to be able to just eat it when it's around. Dieting sucks.

 
At 6/27/2006 8:49 PM, Blogger CP said...

You are a brave woman and I for one, am very proud of you. I will walk on this journey with you. Absolutely. I am a very comfortable fat girl, but for the sake of seeing my children have their children...I am interested in being HEALTHIER.

Congrats doll. I will check in with you regularly. Keep up the good work.

CP.

 
At 6/28/2006 4:36 PM, Blogger Speckledpup said...

sistah!
I'm there with you.
Starting a diet on July 5th...yes there's a reason that I'm waiting until then.
But I have 120 pounds to lose....
will be checkin on ya and commenting...I'm sure.

 
At 6/29/2006 9:05 PM, Blogger jeopardygirl said...

Ms. M, on February 16th, I weighed 227 lbs. Today, June 29th, I weigh 196 lbs. I have another 66 lbs. to go before I reach my target weight of 130 lbs. (Although I'm only 5'1", I have broad shoulders and hips. The last time I weighed less than 130, I was 13 years old).

I also have PCOS. You can do this! I don't know how Nutri/System works, but I am eating 6 small meals a day, walking at least 30 minutes a day and dying for a piece of cake. Tomorrow's my birthday...what are the chances? lol.

Good Luck!

 
At 7/02/2006 4:40 AM, Blogger Queenmatrai said...

Gosh...Keep the spirit up and we're here for you...

Noojes

 
At 7/03/2006 2:20 PM, Blogger Maven said...

Oopsies...

No comment there!

Good luck with this endeavor!

 
At 7/06/2006 2:19 PM, Blogger Ms. M said...

CP, Being healthy is all I want. I don't care if I'm thin so much as I want to be healthy and in good enough shape to play sports or do fun things.

Mr. F, I FEEL determined, I HOPE I'm smart! :P

SpeckledPup, I guess we can track our weight loss together then! Keep posting and let me know of your progress!

Sage, Congrats on the weight loss!! Bravo! How did you do it?

Jeopardygirl, I bet it feels awesome to break below 200lbs!!! I "weight" with bated breath! Teehee!

Noojes, Thanks girl!

Nuggetmaven, Thanks! I'll be checking your turdmania site for some recipes! Any you might recommend?

 
At 5/11/2007 2:52 AM, Blogger Unknown said...

the Weight Watchers and other similar diet plans have dismal failure rates. To appeal to the mainstream, who presently are eating a diet predominating in “fake” low-nutrient processed foods,the weight watchers must perpetuate the same nutritional mistakes that lead people down the path to obesity, diabetes, heart disease and cancer. The leading cause of death in the modern world today is heart disease. Most people consume a weight diet rich in processed foods and high saturated fat animal products that guarantees them a future destiny with heart disease. It is this same style of eating that fuels the obesity epidemic. To end these unnecessary tragedies, to get real results in the weight-watchers arena and to save lives, we need to eat much differently.
http://www.fairdiet.com/

 

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